Analog Art

Maybe because it's autumn, or maybe, it's due to the 50% off Michael's (art supply chain) coupon, I am inspired to paint with oils again.  I am in love with the smells.  Oils give such a strong odor, it's breath taking.  I discover peace when I paint.  It may be the fumes which get me giddy, but I'd argue a different point.   

Everyone finds an activity which they can just let their mind slack off and take a breather.  For most, sports/ physical activity add that element of "clarity".  I am too distracted by the sounds of my own body when I work out.  I hear the echoed breathing; the chub rub sound, and the loudest of all -the super critical inner voice: "I look fat in these shorts, I need to wear baggier clothes." or "My lard thighs are jiggling, and I bet they're all looking".  For me, painting takes a special kind of concentration, quieting the inner voice and my only focus develops through colors.  

The first layer of paint always looks messy, as if I was a four year old learning to color inside the lines.  It's not until adding shadows and highlights does the painting start to truly live.  I like to make certain lines or details POP with extra gobs of paint, this adds more of a 3D appeal.  If you've ever been to a museum and noticed they have guards in every room, they stalk the art because more often then not, people try to touch the paintings.  Humans are tactile creatures, we want our fabrics soft, our pets fluffy, and our oil paintings bumpy.  As I continue to paint, more and more blobs of oily goodness will appear -currently I find myself anxious for the paint to dry, the more paint = more drying time.  I suppose I will also learn the art of patience as time progresses. 

For now, I am pausing from digital joys and going analog with art.  

I Live A Different Life Inside My Head

I am carrying this over from an old blogity blog blog of mine, on myspace (HA) but even now, this makes me smile:

November 30th, 2005

I have these little wooden ladies sitting on the tv stand. And to think I almost threw them out if it weren't for Robert telling me to keep them. He picked one of them up and said, "I saved you bitches." Thank you Robert for your wisdom.

As for updates, well I don't do them too often because it's a pain in the arse to work html, upload pictures searching for my ftp application, then repasting code... whine whine whine.

For those of you who care, I am alright. I am safe. I am working on happy. *Photoshop has saved my life.*Perspective my dears, I am trying to hold fast unto that.

Here's the deal, I lived in New Orleans for nearly 3 1/2 years. Due to Hurricane Katrina, I moved. I was at a low point, since I was moving crap out of my apartment. I was fortunate enough to live Uptown on Magazine Street -a place unaffected by the weather conditions. I did have two windows blown out, other than that most of my stuff was still around. I did have to decide what I was taking with, since I was leaving the city. Everything I took fit in a van, some how even these silly Babushka dolls were going to be tossed along with many other toys. My friend Robert talked me down from my crazy state. For a week we drank beer, hung out while I avoided packing. I felt lost like so many during that time of transition. Some days, I still think I haven't recovered. Sigh.

Breaking Out the Blogger Chops

Most of the best stories ever told begin in the middle. That is what I intend to do. Draw you into my world by throwing you smack dab in the center without a map, compass, or GPS. You are on a journey avec moi. So, shall we get on with it? Right.

I bought a brand spanking gorgeous new camera. It was an impulse buy. Do I regret it... of course, was it worth it... you bet. What did I get? A Canon EOS Rebel T2i SLR Body & 3 Lens with an 8GB card and extras.

I think with all purchases over 20 dollars, I have to digest the idea of how long it took me to earn the money I will be handing over. When purchasing on eBay, one doesn't really have time to think. If there is only a minute left, a split second decision must be made.

When you hit the eBay button "place bid", you had better make sure you really want the item. I admit that in my past, I would bid on things so far out of my price range just to experience the sensation that I bid on something massive. I Bid on a $4000 diamond ring and a Rolls-Royce. Clicking on the "bid now" I became titillated. Anxiously I would refresh the page just to make sure I was out bid. My final click-happy thrill ride was over when I hit confirm bid on a house, it was a whole day before I was out bid. That was the longest day of my life. I didn't have an extra 100 thou sitting around in my bank account: who does? About mid way through my exhausting wait, I admitted to my fiancé that I was in over my head. I'm sure people back out of deals all the time, but I can't express the shame I felt when I was asked "Why on earth did you do that?” SHAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaammmmmmmmmmmeeeeeee. Ever since then, I only bid on items I am certain I can afford.

This brings us back to the camera. I'm a bit of a junky. I have three perfectly working cameras just sitting on a shelf, but alas, like all addictions this one demanded to be heard. I have decided to make all my stories in photos to justify my purchase; but, between you and me, there is no justification needed, I just wanted it.